We’d talked online for about three months before we first met. I thought I’d known her, I thought we’d be comfortable with each other, I was on the plane I sent her a text message “I’m nervous about meeting you”, she replied back “don’t be, I’m feeling calm actually”

When we met, I felt… surreal, like it was a fantastic dream, she on the other hand looked nervous as anything which made me even more confident.

The next day we went to a cafe at a shopping center, we went around the corner of the cafe so we’d be more alone, though we weren’t really – it was a open at both ends to more shops, we sat without saying anything. I was just looking at her face, 24 hours later I still felt like none of this was real, like it was too good to be real.

By then, we still had not held hands, or touched at all, not even bumped into each other by mistake!

I thought, I really want to hold her hand.

I felt a funny taste in my mouth and my legs get very weak -good thing we were sitting-. I didn’t know if what I was going to do was gonna work or not.

I held our my hand to her.

at this stage we weren’t married so we COULDN’T touch each other. This might be difficult to understand, but for Muslims, if you’re not married, you can’t be together.

I don’t know why I did that, I did not want her to take my hand because it was wrong, but I SO wanted to feel her hand. It was a second, but a very long second, it felt like a minute.

During that one second, her hand was holding mine; it was the most amazing feeling, so soft, so small in my own hand, so warm, and holding on to my hand, the next moment however was the one I’ll never forget.

Holding her hand I look into her eyes, I have a hunger to taste those lips, and I see that same hunger in her eyes, I’m scared of going for the next move, but what the #@$% I think, I pull her hand towards me and lean in slowly.

She leans at the same time towards me and our lips meet. Our hands tighten, and we kiss.

That was my first kiss, I don’t remember if her lips were soft, or if it was a wet kiss, or if we did it right. I do remember that my heart beat so fast I was afraid it would leave my chest, I remember holding her elbow as we kissed, I remember that I kissed not because I wanted to kiss, but because I wanted to kiss HER ! It was the most special moment in my life.


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